Yesterday I stumbled upon an article in the New York Post about bridesmaids and the title caught my eye: “Bridesmaids under pressure to get fit for ‘picture-perfect’ wedding day.” Before I even clicked the link, I knew I was in store for some total bull shit, and boy was I right!
The article has me livid because, spoiler alert, the brides interviewed want a perfect wedding day. That perfect day includes perfect pictures, with perfectly “fit” bridesmaids. Which means these brides see no harm in “encouraging” (yes that’s the word they use) their bridesmaids to lose weight.
Oh no she didn’t ask her to lose weight!?
I am not even kidding when I say the article contains the sentence, “even one bridesmaid who just gave birth could stand to lose a few pounds.”
Excuse our language but; you’ve got to be fucking kidding me?
Hold onto your seats though, because there is also this gem of advice from that same bride to her guests:
“I need everyone on board,” says Barton, a 30-year-old p.r. executive who lives in downtown Brooklyn. “I want my guests to invest in their appearances, feel pretty, go buy the dress of their dreams and feel confident in themselves. I want everyone to feel and look beautiful.”
So yes, some brides even think they can control what their guests look like on their special day. Extending the pressure to lose weight to anyone that attends their wedding. News flash darling, you can only control yourself.
Being asked to be a bridesmaid is a fantastic honor as it not only solidifies just how much your friendship means to the bride, but also that she wants you up there with her on the most romantic day of her life. However, while you’re brushing tears away from your eyes, jumping up and down and squealing over her handcrafted ‘will you be my bridesmaid’ gift box it’s all too easy to say yes! You may be thinking, well, why wouldn’t I? But it’s often only once the excitement has died down and you’ve had a chance to look through everything that you actually see just how much work goes into planning a wedding – even if you’re not the one who’s getting married!
Who Pays For What?
It’s an uncomfortable conversation for anyone but before you get busy clearing your social calendar you need to consider your finances. As we’ve said weddings aren’t cheap. You may be required to contribute a significant amount towards the event. This could include outfits, hotel costs, flights, and a gift for the happy couple. Dresses can range from $100 to $500, and the price could be even more if they’re being designed from scratch. Many brides try to keep expenses down, and often try to cover as much as they can to show their appreciation for the bridal party.
As most of you following along know, my sister got married last year. Along with this joyous occasion came the traditional celebrations of a bridal shower and a bachelorette party. I’ve mentioned before that planning these things was a bit chaotic with the bridesmaids living in different states and countries. When we planned the bridal shower, we split the duties up between the bridesmaids and the bride’s mother. It was an all around success!
When it came time to plan the bachelorette party, we decided to host it in Atlantic City. The majority of people lived within an hour of that location, so we made a weekend out of it. Over 20 people were invited, but I was convinced I could handle all aspects of planning the bachelorette on my own. I did ask for input from the other bridesmaids, but ultimately I wanted to be the lead decision maker. I felt that was best so we could move forward in a timely fashion.
Well my friends, we had an amazing time with the 16 people who were in attendance. However, I learned a few lessons the hard way when trying to organize that many people. I would definitely do a few things different if given the chance. So to help you avoid some bachelorette party pitfalls, I’d like to share with you some do’s and dont’s for planning a weekend long trip. First up…
Your friend is getting married and you’re overjoyed by the happy news. You know that any day now she’ll find a cheeky way to say, “will you be my bridesmaid?” There are things to consider before being a bridesmaid, but of course you’ll forget that and gleefully accept.
Plus you’ve never been a bridesmaid before and you’re a little nervous. You can’t help but think of some of the horror stories you’ve heard involving bridesmaid drama. Plus you know it can be expensive!
What To Know
Never fear. We’ve got you covered! In our guest post for The Clued Up Bride, we’ll talk about the five things you MUST know before becoming a bridesmaid. It’s not all sunshine and rainbows, however, being prepared will help you enjoy your time as a bridesmaid.
Find out our tips by reading the full article here:
What do you think about the average cost for being a bridesmaid? What tips do you have for future bridesmaids? Share with us in the comments.
This is a guest post from Jennifer Morrow, blogger at 2morrows Dress.
In my 20’s I was a serial Bridesmaid. Every couple of months (or more) some friend or family member was getting married. Often I was a Bridesmaid, or I had some role in the Wedding. Here are a few of the wackiest requests that I received from Brides.
Short Hair, Bride Cared
A good friend from college announced her engagement and asked me to be a Bridesmaid, with one tiny request. I had short hair. Really short. At the time it was chin length, and had been various shorter styles for all the years that she knew me. All of the other Bridesmaids had long hair, at least past their shoulders. With 11 months notice before the wedding, the Bride asked me to grow out my hair so that all of the Bridesmaids could have matching updo hairstyles. So I did. The day after her wedding, my hair was cut 8 inches, back above my chin.
Grew my hair out. What do you think? Like it now?